WICKED WEDNESDAYS

Fear

CBC radio recently produced a series of programs on the topic of fear. I didn’t hear all of them but I did hear one about dying. One of the speakers was a palliative care physician who had attended more than 1,000 dying patients. He said that almost everyone who spoke to him said that their first and most overwhelming fear was that they would suffer pain. Once they believed pain would be controlled the second most common fear was that after they died they would be forgotten.

Of course, in time, unless we are famous and even that is no guarantee, we all will be forgotten.

But the things we make may still be here and celebrated.

It occurred to me that subconsciously people create books, paintings or music in the hope that these works will survive and remind future generations that their creators existed even if their names are no longer known. Think of prehistoric wall paintings, of biblical texts and of treasured books and works of art. I have a crazy quilt with someone’s initials and the date, Feb. 1908, a record that the creator lived and was proud of her work.

Of course fear of being forgotten is not the primary reason for creativity but I suspect that, whether or not we acknowledge it, somewhere in our subconscious we feel that way.

This wish to have our creations remain may inhibit our efforts if we fear not being able to meet our own standards, having our work survive and not be as good as it could have been.This can stop the creative process as effectively as a roadblock stops a truck. What if it isn’t good enough? What if I can’t get the effect I want? The questions bubble up to challenge us.

The answer of course is as Franklin Roosevelt said in his inaugural speech, ‘all we have to fear is fear itself.’ Once we cope with that bugaboo we can get on with the job. Writing the story, the chapter, the book - the work that will outlast us.

A member of the Ladies Killing Circle, Joan Boswell co-edited four of their short story anthologies: Fit to Die, Bone Dance, Boomers Go Bad and Going Out With a Bang. Her three mysteries, Cut Off His Tale, Cut to the Quick and, Cut and Run were published in 2005, 2007 and 2007. The latest in the series, Cut to the Bone, will be published by Dundurn in November. In 2000 she won the $10,000 Toronto Star’s short story contest. Joan lives in Toronto with three flat-coated retrievers.

WICKED WEDNESDAYS

Creativity

Everyone could be and at one time was creative.

Children love imaginative play. They tell stories, make things, manipulate toys and draw and paint with joy. Sadly, somewhere along the line, some lose their confidence in their ability to create.

How many of us have heard people say that they couldn’t think of a story, couldn’t draw a straight line, couldn’t express themselves or suffered from writer’s block.
I’m pretty sure this lack of confidence happens around the age of eleven when children, particularly girls, begin to care what others think of their efforts. They internalize critical remarks and allow the negative guy to sit on their shoulders carping, criticizing and questioning what they do.

This new awareness immobilizes them. They want to make things but don’t think they can meet their own or other people’s standards so they don’t try. It’s sad because creating makes you happy and it’s depressing to see so many frozen by fear of failing, fear of ‘not being good enough.’

Failure is necessary.

Trying something and not having it succeed is the basis for improvement. Fear of failing is paralyzing and, until you can get by that barrier, you can’t go ahead. If this fear affects you there are those who can help you move beyond this wall. Deanne Fitzpatrick is a Nova Scotia artist whose medium is hooked rugs. An artist in hooked rugs? Sounds banal but go on her web site or examine her museum pieces and you’ll see that she is an artist.

Recently Deanne was interviewed on an American Radio blog. Here is her introduction to the interview: "Dear Diary, I often listen to Lesley Riley’s Interviews with a variety of artists on Art and Soul Radio online. She asks good questions and gets me thinking about art and creativity. I really liked her show so I wrote to thank her for it because I do that sometimes. When I did, she invited me to be a guest on her show, and I was delighted to do. If you want to hear me talk about my rugs, the studio, and art and creativity then you can listen below. I would encourage to subscribe to Lesley’s show on iTunes. It is interesting and fun to listen to while you hook your rugs."

As we all know, you make time for your art whether it be writing, painting, fibre arts or music. It is that repeated daily work that makes you a professional. But more than that you have to believe that you are a writer, a painter, a creator and move beyond fear of failure.

Download the interview and see if you don’t find food for thought. Listen to the Art and Soul Radio interview here…. http://www.blogtalkradio.com/art-and-soul-radio/2012/04/23/deanne-fitzpatrick-the-artist-behind-the-mat

A member of the Ladies Killing Circle, Joan Boswell co-edited four of their short story anthologies: Fit to Die, Bone Dance, Boomers Go Bad and Going Out With a Bang. Her three mysteries, Cut Off His Tale, Cut to the Quick and, Cut and Run were published in 2005, 2007 and 2007. The latest in the series, Cut to the Bone, will be published by Dundurn in November. In 2000 she won the $10,000 Toronto Star’s short story contest. Joan lives in Toronto with three flat-coated retrievers.